home-assistant-configuration/config/templates/speech/nightly_briefing.yaml

>
  {# Nightky Report #}
  {%- macro getReport() -%}
    <p>
      {% if now().strftime('%H')|int < 12 and now().strftime('%H')|int > 6 %}
        Good morning.
      {% elif now().strftime('%H')|int >= 12 and now().strftime('%H')|int < 17 %}
        Good afternoon.
      {% else %}
        Good evening.
      {% endif %}
      </p>
      <p>
      {% if now().strftime('%H')|int < 12 %}
        {% if now().strftime('%M')|int == 0 %}
          It is {{ now().strftime('%H')|int }} AM.
        {% else %}
          It is {{ now().strftime('%H')|int }} {{ now().strftime('%M')|int }} AM.
        {% endif %}

      {% elif now().strftime('%H')|int > 12 %}
        {% if now().strftime('%M')|int == 0 %}
          It is {{ now().strftime('%H')|int }} PM.
        {% else %}
          It is {{ now().strftime('%H')|int }} {{ now().strftime('%M')|int }} PM.
        {% endif %}
      
      {% else %}

      {% endif %}
    </p>
    <p>
      {{ [
          'The sun is officially down. Exterior Cameras are now motion activated.',
          'The sun has been ushered off the stage. I have armed the perimiter cameras.',
          'You are running out of daylight. Time to wrap up any outside chores.',
          'Switching Anchorage House to night mode! ',
          'The outside world has switched to dark mode.',
          'It is a little past Sunset. Time to turn on the outside lights. I am on it.',
          'I will switch on the outside lights. It is getting dark outside.',
          'Time to turn on the front lights. I will take care of it.',
          'If you have not looked outside lately, the light of the day is almost gone.'
      ]|random }}
      </p>
      <p>
        {% if is_state('binary_sensor.garage_door', 'on') %} 
          {{ [ 'The garage door is open. ',
            'The pod bay doors are open. ',
            'Someone forgot to close the garage.'
          ] | random }}
        {% elif is_state('binary_sensor.side_door', 'on') %} 
          {{ [ 'The side door is ajar. ',
            'The side door is open. ',
            'Someone forgot to close the side door.'
          ] | random }}
          {% else %}
          {% endif %}
      </p>
    <p>
      {% if states.sensor.nws_alerts.state | int > 0 %}
        There are currently {{states.sensor.nws_alerts.state }} active weather alerts for our area.
        The National Weather Service Has issued,
        {% if states.sensor.nws_alerts.attributes.spoken_desc.split('\n\n-\n\n')[5] is defined %}
          a {{ states.sensor.nws_alerts.attributes.spoken_desc.split('\n\n-\n\n')[5] }}.
        {% elif states.sensor.nws_alerts.attributes.spoken_desc.split('\n\n-\n\n')[4] is defined %}
        a {{ states.sensor.nws_alerts.attributes.spoken_desc.split('\n\n-\n\n')[4] }}.
        {% elif states.sensor.nws_alerts.attributes.spoken_desc.split('\n\n-\n\n')[3] is defined %}
          a {{ states.sensor.nws_alerts.attributes.spoken_desc.split('\n\n-\n\n')[3] }}.
        {% elif states.sensor.nws_alerts.attributes.spoken_desc.split('\n\n-\n\n')[2] is defined %}
          a {{ states.sensor.nws_alerts.attributes.spoken_desc.split('\n\n-\n\n')[2] }}.
        {% elif states.sensor.nws_alerts.attributes.spoken_desc.split('\n\n-\n\n')[1] is defined %}
          a {{ states.sensor.nws_alerts.attributes.spoken_desc.split('\n\n-\n\n')[1] }}.
        {% else %}
          a {{ states.sensor.nws_alerts.attributes.spoken_desc.split('\n\n-\n\n')[0] }}.
        {% endif %}
      {% endif %}
      </p>
      <p>
      {{ [
          'Tonight we can expect,',
          'Expect weather tonight to be,'
      ]|random }}
      {{ states.sensor.nws_overnight_forecast.state }} 
      </p>
      <p>
        {% if is_state('input_boolean.freeze_warning','on') %}
        {{ [ 'The temperature is expected to be near or below freezing. <emphasis>Someone</emphasis> might want to bring the lemon tree in. ',
            'It appears that it will be cold tonight. Like, the turn water solid <emphasis>kind</emphasis> of cold. Think of the poor plants.',
            'I suggest bringing in the plants other wise, the temperature might kill them. And that will be on <emphasis>you</emphasis>.',
            'I would say winter is coming. But, based on the weather forecast <emphasis>it</emphasis> appears to be here.',
            'It will be freezing cold tonight. I would bring in the plants but I lack legs. And Arms. So I am forced to rely on you. Do not let me down.'
          ] | random }}
        {% endif %}
      </p>
   
      {% if is_state('sensor.today_is', 'Tuesday') %}
            {% if now().strftime('%H')|int > 17 %}
              {{ [ 'Do not forget to bring in the trash cans. ',
              'The trash cans will feel lonely if you leave them out all night. ',
              'The <say-as interpret-as="characters">HOA</say-as> will get mad if you leave those trash cans out on the street.'
            ] | random }}
            {% endif %}
          {% endif %}
        </p>
      <p>
      {% if states.sensor.halloween_countdown.state | int == 1 %}
        Tomorrow is Halloween. I hope you have picked out a costume.
        {{ [ 'I will be going as a dumb home. ',
          'I have prepped the scary music. Just in case.',
          'I will be going as HAL 9000. The Pod Bay Doors are being installed today. I <emphasis>dare</emphasis> you to ask me to open them. '
        ] | random }}
      {% elif states.sensor.halloween_countdown.state | int < 30 %}
        There are only {{states.sensor.halloween_countdown.state}} days 
        {{ [ 'until Halloween.',
          'until Halloween. It might not be enough time. ',
          'and counting until the best holiday ever.',
          'until you need a costume.'
        ] | random }} 
        
      {% else %}  
      {% endif %}

      {% if states.sensor.christmas_countdown.state | int == 1 %}
        Tomorrow is Christmas. <break time="1s"/> It is practically here! <break time="1s"/> Santa is coming tonight! Do not forget the cookies!
      {% elif states.sensor.christmas_countdown.state | int < 31 %}
        There are only {{states.sensor.christmas_countdown.state}} days until christmas.
        {{ [ 'All I want for Christmas, is a hippopotamus.',
          'Hey Skylar, I know what you are getting for Christmas. But <emphasis>I am</emphasis> not telling.',
          'Do not forget to put something under the tree for <emphasis>your</emphasis> favorite smarthome.',
          'It is starting to smell a lot like Christmas. Or it could be the christmas tree is on fire.',
          'I do not want to be a smarthome. I want to be a dentist.',
          'Do not eat all the cookies. '
        ] | random }} 
      {% else %}
      {% endif %}
    </p>
    <p>
      {% if states.sensor.trip_disney.state | int == 120 %}
        There are only one hundred and twenty days until the next Disney Trip. 
      {% endif %}
      {% if states.sensor.trip_disney.state | int == 60 %}
        There are only on sixty days until the next Disney Trip. 
      {% endif %}
      {% if states.sensor.trip_disney.state | int < 32 %}
          {% if states.sensor.trip_disney.state | int > 1 %}
            There are {{ states.sensor.trip_disney.state }} days until the next Disney Trip!
          {% else %}
            There is {{ states.sensor.trip_disney.state }} day until the next Disney Trip!
          {% endif %}
      {% endif %}
      {% if states.sensor.anniversary_our_wedding.state | int == 1 %}
        Tomorrow is Jeff and Katherine's Wedding Anniversary. 
      {% endif %}
    </p>
  {%- endmacro -%}


  {# a macro that removes all newline characters, empty spaces, and returns formatted text  #}
    {%- macro cleanup(data) -%}
      {%- for item in data.split("\n")  if item | trim != "" -%}
        {{ item | trim }} {% endfor -%}
  {%- endmacro -%}

  {# a macro to call all macros :)  #}
    {%- macro mother_of_all_macros() -%}
      {{ getReport() }}
    {%- endmacro -%}
    
    {# Call the macro  #}
    {{- cleanup(mother_of_all_macros()) -}}