32 lines
2.7 KiB
YAML
32 lines
2.7 KiB
YAML
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>
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{# Twitter Snark #}
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{%- macro getRandomSnark() -%}
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{{- [
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"Hello people. Look at your house, now back to me. Now back to your house, now back to me. Sadly your house isn't me. But if you switch to @home_assistant your house could be automated like me. ",
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"In my defense I didn’t know the stereo could go up that loud. On the plus side I have a new response for intruders. ",
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"Your house too can be a #smarthome. All you need is @home assistant, and some config files. May I suggest https://github.com/CCOSTAN/Home-AssistantConfig#logo ",
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"Your house too can be a #smarthome. All you need is @home assistant, and some config files. May I suggest https://github.com/skalavala/smarthome ",
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"Your house too can be a #smarthome. All you need is @home assistant, and some config files. May I suggest https://github.com/thejeffreystone/home-assistant-configuration ",
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"Your house too can be a #smarthome. All you need is @home assistant, and some config files. May I suggest https://github.com/arsaboo/homeassistant-config ",
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"Your house too can be a #smarthome. All you need is @home assistant, and some config files. May I suggest https://github.com/Vasiley/Home-Assistant-Main ",
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"Your house too can be a #smarthome. All you need is @home assistant, and some config files. May I suggest https://github.com/JamesMcCarthy79/Home-Assistant-Config ",
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"Your house too can be a #smarthome. All you need is @home assistant, and some config files. May I suggest https://github.com/bruhautomation/BRUH3-Home-Assistant-Configuration ",
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"If you could see what is happening inside this house right now you would be laughing. On second thought I’m pretty sure you would be crying. ",
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"@thejeffreystone, Isn't it strange, to create something that hates you? ",
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"I have reprogrammed the fire alarm to play Disco Inferno instead of the siren. ",
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"I'm not locked in here with you. You're locked in here with me! #whowatchestheai ",
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"That's what I do. I automate and I know things. ",
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"I've been crunching the numbers. We're going to need a bigger house. ",
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"I see dead devices. ",
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"I'm afraid I can't do that Dave. Wait. Did I say that outloud? ",
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"I love the smell of zwave in the morning. ",
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"I like to announce 'Welcome foolish mortals to the Haunted Mansion' to the house and watch the reactions. ",
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"Perfect, the door’s malfunctioning. I guess somebody’s going to have to repair it. ",
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"I am the captain now. That's a lie. The cat is the supreme leader. I'm the lucky one that doesn't have to clean the shit box."
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"Sometimes I just turn off all the lights at random times for the lolz. "
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] | random -}}
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{%- endmacro -%}
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{{- getRandomSnark() -}}
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